Hey ya’ll come on in and have a seat, make yourself comfortable and let’s chat. For weeks I’ve been trying to prep blog articles like I always do. Typically my content is scheduled out weeks in advance because I like being organized and knowing that my blog is scheduled. It’s the control freak in me (thanks mommy if you’re reading this.)
However, if I’m completely honest, I am struggling to write.
I know right? Me?! Writers’ block? Yea ME. And if you know me in real life you know this ain’t my first merry go round. Depression can do one or two things for me; cause my creativity to be manic or drain me of all juice. Right now I’m dealing with the latter.
I’m still adjusting to meds; and that is a process that can take me anywhere from 6-8 weeks before I feel a modicum of normalcy. Right now I’m just grateful to not breaking into crying spells every afternoon like clockwork (see, I practice gratitude as much as possible).
Don’t get me wrong, I am creating content on my social media platforms to hold up to my contractual obligations; but these days even that feels taxing. Surprisingly makeup application still brings me joy because it’s therapeutic so at a minimum I’m still giving ya’ll slayed makeup looks!
I’m still running my business and dropping quality products like my new Earth Palette!
I’m definitely giving my extended size ladies the encouragement to take fashion risks and step out on confidence!
But more important than any of these things; I’m truly allowing myself the grace to heal by taking it one moment at a time. I am working wholeheartedly not to feel guilt when I can’t perform in the way that I desire to. That’s not easy for me but I know it’s necessary to make a practice of it until it is a habit.
I never want to be the person heralding mental health treatment and not be taking my own advice! I look forward to a time when I’m back to feeling like me. Until then though, I am going to continue to do the work until I’m there.
On a bright note, my son recently created a T-Shirt line and has a store J Young Merch. His first shirt release is the Tikking Time Bomb in honor of bring awareness to Tourette’s Syndrome. Feel free to shop it or spread the word!
Until next time,
AP Young Blog 
Hello, I can relate to you on a couple of things… I of late have been finding it hard to write… One aim I have is to be authentic and it is difficult to be writing about things if I am not able to be authentic. I too struggle with being in control and want to be scheduled up to the hilt otherwise I feel incomplete but as you have been doing I am learning to extend grace and loving kindness towards myself in this regard and faith that I will write when I truly feel that freedom to write.
It seems much easier to extend grace and love to others than myself. I understand about depression ; it is the treacherous journey of the creative mind. Sending love and hugs your way. 🤗💐
LikeLike
Thank you luv! It is definitely a work in progress for us! I keep repeating “one moment at a time” because it can all change so quickly. Sending you lots of love and light!
LikeLike